One need not be sad about death simply because there will be so many things left undone or experiences left unlived. After death, there is no one there to experience that sense of missing out. The person who has died does not sit somewhere regretting the journeys not taken, the pleasures not experienced, or the years that might have been. That sense of loss belongs to those who remain and loved that person. And while we cannot make that grief disappear, we can—and should—do everything we can during our lives to reduce the burden it leaves behind.
There is also something strangely familiar about the idea of no longer experiencing. Every night, sleep gives us a small trailer of what death might be like. We close our eyes, lose awareness of the world, and hours can pass without us experiencing their passage. We don’t struggle against it every night; we surrender to it naturally, and then wake up and continue living. Death may be permanent where sleep is temporary, but the absence of experience itself is not something we consciously suffer through.
But while we are alive, we cannot simply adopt that detached perspective. Evolution has wired us to survive, protect ourselves, seek pleasure, form attachments, be curious, explore, achieve and experience. These impulses are not things we can simply switch off because we intellectually understand that life will eventually end. As long as we are alive, we are wired to live.
And perhaps that is the important distinction. Accepting death does not mean withdrawing from life. Death may be inevitable, but until it comes, life is still happening—and the natural response of a living being is to participate in it. We continue to love, work, sing, explore, enjoy, worry, hope and look after the people who matter to us. There is no contradiction between knowing that life will end and living it fully while it lasts.
